Introducing Pardon My Banger! Where lolglobetrotting will be sharing all of their favorite jams. We are talking songs for running, for the campfire, for the airplane, for the morning. Whenever you need to escape the the annoying girls and boys for some blissful noise, you know where to come.
To kick it off, we have the ONLY playlist you’ll need for your Summer runs this year. Am I saying that if you listen to this playlist your run will be the most fun thing you do every day? Yes, hell yeah that’s what I’m saying. If you don’t get to the end of your run and feel like you just got done riding an elephant through the Amazon while successfully rescuing a beautiful princess from a dastardly tyrant, then I have failed you.
Now, if you’ll Pardon My Banger, let’s get to the lineup.
Top of the Order
This baby is going to set the stage for the whole run. Starts off slow for 30 seconds as you get into your form, but holy shit does this baby pick up in all the right ways. Right at .2 miles you’ll feel a SURGE as your arms are flailing and you’re screaming ‘THIS IS ME!’ at all the unsuspecting passerby.
Now you’re getting into your groove, time to maintain your pace. Kygo plays bangers only, you can always trust him to give you a good time. He might even make a second appearance later in your run if you’re lucky…
RIP Avicii *pours one out*. My favorite Avicii song is hitting cleanup, right where it belongs. Now you’re really feeling yourself as you are crossing the mile mark. As this song hits its climax so will you, sprinting full speed through a field of dandelions with no clue where the running path went. As the beat slows down at the end, make sure to locate the path and make your way back there, because its time to enter phase two.
Let’s Get Funky
Congratulations, you just made it through the easy part. Now you gotta start leaning on your songs for support, and there is nothing better than some good ol fashioned funk to do the job. To kick off phase two, standing 6′ tall hailing from Chicago, CHANCE! Chance The Rapper, with All Night. This baby is also good for the pregame party you’ll be having 3 hours after your run where you are crushing Michelob 64s with your best buds.
You knew Bruno had to make an appearance. Dripping with finesse and getting paid or dripping with sweat and getting laid (due to your awesome physique from running to this playlist)? I can’t tell the difference. What’s next?
These next 2 by Jess Glynn and Gryffin & Illenium are both bangers, that is no question. What is in question is how ridiculous this feels that you are CRUSHING your steps goal for the day while having the time of your life. How is that happening? You’re welcome, my friend. I accept IOUs. Anyways, these two will carry you through the hardest part of the run.
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Pulling Bangers From a Hat
This is the phase where I have the most fun, time to kick it into high gear. You’re dripping sweat, your joints are talking back to you like a sassy teenager, and you need some inspiration. I have a beerbong and a bentley for ya. While jamming out to this bad boy, just imagine those Michelob 64s you got comin’ your way later tonight.
Here comes the most underrated song on earth. Officially. Call the Guinness Book of World Records, they’ll confirm. Less than 500k views on YouTube? Does Lulleaux have the worst promoter in history? This bad boy belongs on 101.3 KDWBangers from here to eternity.
Are you running with someone? Take 10 seconds to tell them you love them. Are you not running with someone? Stop by the nearest pedestrian and confess your love. It won’t be weird, especially if they’re listening to some Galantis themselves.
OHHHHH BABY 90s time! Ja Rule? Notorious BIG? Need I say more? Yes, I need. This baby has some funky sax to go with the smooth rhymes of some of the greatest to ever do it. Are you running through Brooklyn? Turn this one all the way UP. Even if it feels like you are carrying B.I.G. on your back at this point in your run, time to fire up a fatty full of force and fight through it!
You can see the finish line in the distance, time for the number 2 most underrated banger in history. It doesn’t even feel like I’m running when this comes on, it feels like I’m floating. Floating on a magic carpet playing 4th wheel to Aladdin, Jasmin, and Abu. Weird image, but at this point you are a butt-load of miles into your run and getting just a little delirious.
Let’s bring it home. Final heavy push. The Michelob 64s are so damn close you can taste them. When the beat drops on Let You Go you will lose all control of your body and hit the very top speed those chicken legs can take you. Let out a scream if you must, I know I sure as hell do.
Wow, I am in awe of you you beautiful motherf*ckers. Pat yourselves on the back. Seriously, take a minute, reach that twig behind your head and give yourself a few pats. You’ve earned it. Now, let’s ease into our cool down with a few more jams.
I told you Kygo would make another appearance, and damn I meant it. Bangers only. My personal favorite from the Kids In Love album, but admittedly it’s bit slower, so perfect for the end of a run. Time to kick those feet up, roll around in the grass, slide down a hill, whatever’s in your wheelhouse. You will get no judgment from this direction. As they say, those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.
Keep following for future Pardon My Banger playlists. Submit your own jam suggestions!
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