We got a fever, and the only prescription, is a weekend at a cabin. Literally the best weekend I can imagine. Relaxing, jamming out to some bangers, spending quality time with quality people, having one too many beers, we’re sold. We have a thousand reasons why cabins are my Garden of Eden. Here are our 8 tips to make sure you plan an epic cabin trip.
Be on a Lake
Lakes > Seas > Oceans > No Water. Disagree? Change our mind.
Let’s set the stage. Your eyes blink open, you are warm in your bed but the air is crisp. You make some strong coffee and stroll to the shore, edging out to the end of the dock.
The sun creeps over the tree-line and paints the sky a masterpiece of oranges and blues. Does it get any better? I submit that it cannot!
Whatever floats your boat, you can’t disagree that life on the water is the best. Growing up we spent an unhealthy amount of time in some questionable lake water whenever we had the chance.
Our personal favorite water activity is tubing behind a boat. No, no, no, I’m not talking about some mundane boat pulling a round disk with one person behind it going 20 miles per hour doing soft S-curves. If that’s you, you have my respect, but not my admiration.
I’m talking about 2-3 tubes LOADED with at least 3 people each, careening around the lake at ludicrous speed doing donuts and hard S-curves. Name of the game is finding or making the biggest wave possible on the lake and ripping the crew over it to LAUNCH people into the air. SEND IT!
Best part? This is even more entertaining for people on the boat than it is people on the tubes! The best reality show there is.
Invite Friends & Family
Every year, we take a trip to a Northern Wisconsin cabin with the whole crew, a mix of college friends, childhood ride-or-dies, and anyone who loves a good time really. The cabin itself is not the point of the trip.
The unforgettable (but oft forgotten due to consumption) memories with the people you love is what it is all about. Not to toot our own horn, but having done this for ten plus years, we know a thing or two about how to do this right. Here’s a few tips:
You need people who are down to have fun and have a sense of humor. Get yourself a MAXIMUM number of clowns. People who don’t mind crawling over each other to find a place to sleep.
People who will roll with the punches as you hand them their fourth beer bong of the day. People who won’t thumb their nose at Tommy puking in the bushes and rallying with another Smirnoff Ice. Those are the people you want in your life, but you NEED at the cabin.
No cabin trip is complete without some ridiculous games. Even better? Make it a beer olympics. Choose captains, draft teams, and create a tournament of champions. I’m talking beer ball, beer pong, bean bags, butt beers, spike ball, slap cup, King’s cup.
Find your one friend that is way too competitive (you know who I’m talking about) and make him/her do all the cat-herding getting everyone in place.
I think I’m on pretty firm ground saying that dogs are better than people. Did you cry in I Am Legend when the dog died? How about when all the people died of the virus? Point made. For all you statisticians out there, we have proven that there is a perfectly positive correlation between number of dogs present and amount of fun to be had on your cabin trip. It’s science.
Life’s Better on a Beach
If you meet someone who mutters, “meh, I’m not that into beaches” you RUN away! Run as fast as you can! I don’t even care what direction you go (but I do care what playlist you’re jamming to), just get your butt moving in a direction away from that individual.
Life is too short to associate with people who hate beaches. Do they have sand in their penis/vagina? Obviously not, because they haven’t been to the beach, but goodness me their attitude needs and adjustment!
Pro tip for your next beach trip: as with many things, alcohol can make it a bit more fun. If alcohol isn’t allowed, maybe there are a few ways you can treat that as a guideline rather than a hard-and-fast rule. Am I telling you to slip a cold beer into a McDonalds cup? Are you hearing me say that you can stuff your bra with a bag of Franzia? Of course not…
Play Outdoor Games
Volleyball is the GOAT of outdoor games. Sweet spot is 4-6 people per team. If you are playing with any couples, make sure they are on opposite teams. Can’t stress this enough. If they’re on the same team, they’ll spend the whole time bitching at each other.
Love is love. If they’re on opposite teams, then every once in a while you get the beautiful moment, the one you dream about, where one gets to spike it on the other.
Coming in behind the GOAT is Spike Ball, with bean bag toss falling into bronze medal position. In our humble opinion, at least.
Don’t Set an Alarm Clock
Going to bed without an alarm clock is the highest high human beings can achieve, and alarm clocks have no place at cabins. Anyone who disagrees with that should not be invited, and that is a fact.
Come to think of it, going all Office Space on an alarm clock would be an excellent way to kick off the weekend!
Hand in hand with the alarm clock. Technology is the ENEMY at the cabin, except as a means to play bangers. Lift those eyes up from that 4-inch screen and see the world!
There is legitimate science behind this one. Time spent on your phone is time not spent experiencing life to the fullest! At the cabin, time is the ultimate resource. You should be having so much fun that you forget about that distraction machine and focus on spending some QT (quality time) with the people you love to spend time with!
Food, Food, Food
There is not a cabin on this earth that doesn’t have a grill. Facts are facts. If it doesn’t have a grill, then it is not a cabin.
Point number 2: We dare you to find a piece of food that is not better when cooked on the grill. We have tested this theory for the last 10 years. We believe this more wholeheartedly than we believe that the earth round. And we are not flat-earthers…
There is zero, zilch, nada, NOT ONE edible item that isn’t better grilled. Charcoal vs gas vs pellets? Doesn’t matter, as long as it is hot enough that you are breathing fire after you take the first bite.
Aaaaaaand Giant Inflatables
This has been a recent addition to our cabin trips, and let us say: giant inflatables are a game changer.
Right off the bat, these live up to their name. They are ENORMOUS. Basically a floating living room. If you wanted, you could sleep 10 people on this thing (not recommended).
Looking for a little extra income? Rent out your giant inflatable as an Airbnb room and see if you get any takers! They are THAT big.
Just as they are enormous, these bad boys are RIDICULOUSLY fun to hand out on. The inflated outer ring makes for a perfect bench, and the built-in cooler is a nice addition for all of you 21 and over out there.
If you really want to take this to the next level, figure out how to attach a sail to your inflatable and see where the wind takes you!
The answer to your Christmas gift conundrum for your young daughter or adult son. This giant flamingo will make sure everyone on the lake knows who you are. Stand out and shine, you were born for this.
Rarely seen in the wild, tame this wild horse with a spike in its head today. You’ll be literally floating on a lake, but emotionally floating on a higher plain of enlightenment riding this majestic beast into the sunset.
There you have our 8 tips to having an absolutely epic cabin trip! What are your own tips? Share them in the comments!
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